Part 3 The Good Stuff

Somewhere between the planning, expectations and conflicts was a great ride…

Day one Thursday 7/10 3:00am

I could hardly sleep the night before the ride it was so exciting and I didn’t want to oversleep. Up early to pack the bike and head out to the rally point a Shell gas station sough of Parker, CO. Unfortunately Phil and Ray went to a Conoco station a mile away so we didn’t meet until 3:40 but such is life on the road. We also had our first mechanical issue; Phil’s tail light was burnt out so he could not be seen from behind in the dark. With no way to repair it without parts and nothing open at that time we put phil between Ray and I and off we went to meet Scott for breakfast at Brush, CO – about 140 miles from Parker.

We saw a great sunrise (sorry no pictures, it kept getting better and all of the sudden it was too late) We did experience the strangest weather that morning… The temperature dropped at sunrise as compared to 3:00am to the point that we needed to stop and add a layer of clothing. Scott was waiting in Brush and we had breakfast at a large building with a sigh that read “Hay Auction” (See Above) The building was also home to the Cowboy Church. After breakfast we got gas and hit the road.

At one point rider who will remain nameless took turns leaving the pack and testing the strength on the bungee cords to see if the tent will stay attached at 100+ MPH. After a few minutes of that we rejoined as a group and road at or near the speed limit and crossed into Nebraska. At our next Gas stop we found out that Ray and Phil got very little sleep and needed a nap so we found a park with some shade (it was getting HOT) and they went to sleep as Scott and I found an auto part store to fix Phil’s running light problem, and join them for the last part of the nap. A quick lunch and off to Alliance, NE home of Carhenge http://www.carhenge.com/index.htm a full scale replica of Stonehenge made of Cars. My guess is that Carhenge is a great place to visit if the temperature is in the 70s or 80s but when the day is in the high 90s to low 100s it was just a hot field with a bunch of dead cars.

At this point we were all hot, tired and getting more than a little cranky. The ride out of Nebraska into South Dakota is boring and that is putting it nicely. The Black Hills of South Dakota have some great riding but coming from the south you don’t get to the Black Hills until the last 40 miles or so.

Just as we entered the Black Hills area we passed through the town of Hot Springs where the Bank sign said it was 101 and we are all sure it had cooled down by then, in short it was HOT! The last forty miles to Custer were beautiful and dangerous. The beauty is obvious but the danger was more subtle, it was the combination of several things: 550 miles which are more than most of us ride in a week, heat (Did I mention it was HOT?) and four legged obstacles (Buffalo, Deer and Elk Oh My) On mile 547 of 550 miles with the one traffic light in sight a deer bolted in front of me and I was on the brakes hard and almost got run down by the other guys in the group who didn’t see what had happened. Moments later we entered the KOA with our heart rates returning to normal to see our families were already in the pool. After stripping down and standing under a cold shower for several minutes I began feeling normal again.

What a day!!! Two State Lines, 100+ heat, Car Art, Bike Repair, Midday Naps and a Cold Shower It just doesn’t get any better than that.

We spend two nights in Custer visiting Mt Rushmore and the surrounding area before the families went back to Denver and we pushed to the west but that is another day

More to come.

Get the Bunny 2008 Part 2... Processing the emotions of the ride

This ride had more planning than D-Day; I have been talking, mapping, planning and dreaming about this for more than six months. This is completely contrary to my normal riding approach where I start the ride having no idea where I will end up and only a vague idea of when I will return. This trip not only had maps but reservation for camping every night. As a result the adventure was not to be found in the mystery of the ride but in the mystery of the personalities on the ride.

As the default ride leader it was assumed by everyone that I would make the decisions and on the bike that was fine but when we stopped I was out of my element. My nature is to take things as they come more than direct the outcome and in conflict I am not a “Force of Will” kind of guy. In other words I would make a lousy General.

Our first night camping was only the second time I would setup a tent in my adult life. Given the vast camping experience that Phil had I deferred to him but because that was not clearly communicated it was a surprise to him and how he reacted to that surprise was a surprise to me. Not that Phil is a bad guy; I love him and consider him a friend. Phil is a “Force of Will” kind of leader and after a very long and hot day in the saddle (over 550 miles much in excess of 100 degrees) He was shocked when I didn’t continue to lead when we arrived at the camp. In all the months of planning I never had the division of leadership discussion. So Phil who leads as part of his life, work and ministry was expecting this ride to be a vacation for leadership responsibilities was surprised to be pushed into that role. He took to it but was less than gracious in the transition. He later referred to the event by saying “In the absence of leadership the A-Hole will appear.”

For some time I was thinking that at my age I should move into management at work instead of continuing as a SME (Subject Matter Expert) and Developer. A benefit of this trip was to place that consideration under the microscope of a field trial. I thing I would remain an SME for now and the immediate future.

Scott seems to have a gift for contentment, at least form my prospective he never got caught up in the friction that existed between the three of us. I wish I could learn that contentment but with all the unspoken expectations I had around this trip I set myself up to fail in the area of contentment.

Ray joined the ride at Phil’s invitation so he and I didn’t meet until the morning of day one. He and Phil have had a 30 year history that among other things has seen Ray cycle between being a committed Christian to disappointment and bitterness towards the Church to agnosticism at that point he and Phil will have long and difficult talks to convince him to return to being a committed Christian. At the time of the ride Ray was deep in an agnostic cycle and whiles his stated reason to join the ride was for the ride it seemed to me that his unstated reason was to get time alone with Phil. This caused friction between Ray and Phil in particular and all of us in general. It also seemed to me that Ray is comfortable being a little needy and the point of focus for the group which I would guess contributes to his dissatisfaction with the Church for not meeting his needs. I liked Ray and his sense of humor (The man is a pun machine and is always good for a laugh) but I am not sure I would want to go on another multiple day ride with him.

I started out very angry with Ray and Phil for inviting him but have come to accept the fact that we all brought baggage on the trip (not just the kind you attach to the bike with bungee cords. Ray is a great guy who may never get to know very well.

A large part of my life is spent with men at 12 step meetings who are wounded and want it to be about them but the demands of recovery is you give that attitude up or you don’t recover. I don’t have 30 year relationships with men who don’t change in that time. In recovery if you can’t or won’t change you tend to not stick around the meetings for very long. So I don’t understand Ray and Phil’s relationship. For my part I was also going on vacation from being a 12 step sponsor so encountering a man who reminded me so much of the men who walk into the meetings was not what I was hoping for in a vacation.

So the adventure was not the surprise around the corner it was the surprise around the camp fire. It took me some time to recognize the value in this different type of adventure where the Father called me to walk closer to him in the area of how I see myself and others and to learn how I lack grace for others and myself at times.

Thank You Father for surprises in surprising ways